Where are you?
What do you think each morning?
Do you laugh?
Do you smile?
Three months have passed, and everything has changed. I have found that everything I had ever hoped for you was really hoped for you. I had no ulterior motives. I was there because of you, marveling at your resilience, creativity, and heart.
Have I not seen you because it is too hard? I know it would be hard for me, but I also know that my love for you is strong enough to allow us a new chapter. That confirms that it was always who you are that grew our bond, not other relationships.
You taught me a lot, and I am really thankful for that. Showing someone how much more they have to learn is a unique gift. I do not take it for granted. I just hope you know how important you are. I also hope you know all that you can do.
It is in my nature to see all sides and possible outcomes. I just need confirmation that you are safe and doing well. I think about it a lot. The connections we make in life sometimes feel like we should have them forever in the way they begin. It is clear, and has been for years, that this is not always true.
We all get power from something that carries us through the years of erosion we face. We hold onto it, gripping it as though we are suspended only by it a thousand feet above the ground. At the time, I did not feel that I was preparing for your life's journey; I realized that I was, and honestly, I was not done.
I now have to depend on the undefinable survival skills you possess to keep you safe. It sounds like me making myself feel better knowing you are doing well. I am just not a person who stands on the sidelines of disaster. I used to be, and was that ever a mistake.
This is me and all my flaws. On your side, I stand ready to fight the things that want to pull you down. It is who I am. I hope you understand.
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