I heard you in the morning, before the sounds of the day arrived.
You have been knocking in your own unique ways for many days and nights.
I have chosen to give you no attention.
I know that at some point, I have to open the door, the windows, and sit down to hear what you have to say.
Today, I just say no. I have no time for you and your acidic speak.
What is it that I deny?
I knew that mere defiance would not be enough to keep you on the outside.
You are clever and unstoppable until the day you are defeated.
Of course, I am no match.
My resistance is indeed futile.
Photo by Tyler Clemmensen on Unsplash
Evening falls, and I notice that balance is not so precise.
I allow it no failure while I still hold my defiant heart.
I see a lone sniper from the corner of my eye.
Through the screen, I look at the doorstep.
The news is somber and often unthinkable.
I think about those who disappear from the trail.
I feel overwhelmed and like I cannot continue.
But what was it like when I was -2, or 3?
The disillusionment they felt must have been insurmountable.
It becomes clear to me that my gravity is temporarily missing.
I am disgusted that I am so easily phased by my dependence on material things.
Coupled with my dependence upon all that I have taken for granted,
the wave of paralysis is challenging to overcome.
I know what I need. I just need to find the strength.
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