I heard it in the night
The sum of the cost I could not see
Thinking about how hard it will be
Will there be a sacrifice?
Will there be failure?
I wasn't looking.
I wasn't asking.
What if I just did not move?
What if I did nothing?
The answer was quiet like a whisper, but it was there.
It adds weight to your carry
It steals your self-esteem
The ground upon which I trusted my judgement
being disassembled one stone at a time.
I wake up, and the land is all gone around my bed,
the burden of lava flowing all around.
How did it happen?
I always knew the answer,
But the song on the winds of distrust
sang a clandestine treachery I could not discern,
Or perhaps failed to look at it directly.
Hesitation bursts in like a heist.
Maybe one day, maybe tomorrow.
Don't reach for the high shelf, or
turn off the dream, and just go to bed.
I can feel in the daylight that everything is harder,
but I fail to understand why.
In my distrust, I streamed across a barren land which only I can cultivate.
The dust slowly rises from my tired steps.
Time slipped away too fast, leaving me with no momentum.
False starts stripped all confidence, stealing peace.
Progress was almost immeasurable.
Too late for the train to take me to who I was supposed to be.
Right now is the key.
Time to measure the room I occupy.
Look for the resources that lie about.
Pick something and look at it.
How much does it cost?
What is the loss by just sitting still?
What is heavier and grows just by existing?
What can the work of my hands do?
The taxman takes account of the seditary.
A moving target is so much harder to hit.
The longer we wait, the river gets wider.
The antagonist grows stronger.
30 minutes becomes 30 days of hard labor.
I have written the play,
Prevented the steps.
But that is what is needed.
One step
Breaks the dry mud and makes that step lighter.
Small things matter, because good or bad
They eventually become big things.
I can, I can, I can...
What is the one thing I can do now?
One thing that I will not walk away from?
Be real.
It is about this one step
and
Nothing else.

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